Video University: Video University Forums: Wedding & Event Videography: Weddings for Friends

VideoUniversity.com
Home	Free Library	Store
Free Catalog Please support VU by making your B&H purchases and links through this B&H ad. Doesn't cost a penny more.

See The New VU Postcard Catalog

To post in the forums see the Forum Guidelines.

Join or Renew Today.
New Benefits for all VU Members

Forum Guidelines and FAQ
Main Index	Search Posts
Who's Online	Log In

Home: Video University Forums: Wedding & Event Videography:
Weddings for Friends

X-Keith_Sidden
Imported Account

May 2, 2003, 5:58 PM

Post #1 of 8 (1164 views)
Shortcut

Weddings for Friends	Can't Post

I am just curious how you guys handle it when friends come to you wanting you to tape their wedding? I have been doing weddings for some time now, and this has been a recurring issue. It seems that everyone in the world becomes your best friend and wants a deal. Please help soon.... lol.

X-brian_m
Imported Account

May 2, 2003, 6:32 PM

Post #2 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends	Can't Post

One of the toughest things about this business is saying the word "NO".
It really sucks and I hate to do it. The easy way out is to say that you have a contract out for that date and they are interested in booking you.
I just had to do this last year. My friend's (who has lived in NJ for the last 10 years)sister's friend's friend called me and asked me to do her wedding. My wife did my friend's sister's wedding for free because I was an usher and she knew no one and figured what else is she going to do all day. Well my friend's sister likes to go around telling all her friends how we do weddings for free so this is what her friend expected ... I think. I sent her prices and info explaining that we need a signed contract and a deposit. Five days later she was on a local website looking for a videographer. I knew this because I receive referrals from this site. 5 months later she has my friend's sister call us in her behalf and I told her that we need to speak with the bride. Another 2 months go by and she finally calls and I tell her we're booked. She gets pissed and tells me that I left her without a videographer a month before her wedding. I referred her to an available videographer and she ended up booking him at the same price she would have had to pay me. I was really available by the way but I knew I was never going to see a payment because she thought she knew me and probably figured I'd do it for nothing.
Brian M

X-Crystal
Imported Account

May 2, 2003, 11:17 PM

Post #3 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

I have people wanting me to do free videos all the time (including my church). I just recently explained that although I can give them a discount, I can not afford to do any work for free because it takes away from my paying jobs.
I do make trades sometimes. If the job can get me paying jobs (because of advertising or something like that), I have to consider that. If my friends say want to trade their boat for a video well then.... ;) lol
: I am just curious how you guys handle it when friends come to you wanting you to tape their wedding? I have been doing weddings for some time now, and this has been a recurring issue. It seems that everyone in the world becomes your best friend and wants a deal. Please help soon.... lol.

X-Gilbert
Imported Account

May 3, 2003, 3:30 AM

Post #4 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

I'm just starting to do videos and I get ask by my friends how much of a discount I will give them for their event. My response is "Well let see, I spent nine grand to get this started. How much of a discount you think I can spare". After that they don't ask any more.

Gilbert

X-Bear
Imported Account

May 3, 2003, 8:04 AM

Post #5 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

A true friend would ask wht your rates were and pay full price leaving it up to you whether you want to bring up a "discount" or not.

: One of the toughest things about this business is saying the word "NO".
: It really sucks and I hate to do it. The easy way out is to say that you have a contract out for that date and they are interested in booking you.
: I just had to do this last year. My friend's (who has lived in NJ for the last 10 years)sister's friend's friend called me and asked me to do her wedding. My wife did my friend's sister's wedding for free because I was an usher and she knew no one and figured what else is she going to do all day. Well my friend's sister likes to go around telling all her friends how we do weddings for free so this is what her friend expected ... I think. I sent her prices and info explaining that we need a signed contract and a deposit. Five days later she was on a local website looking for a videographer. I knew this because I receive referrals from this site. 5 months later she has my friend's sister call us in her behalf and I told her that we need to speak with the bride. Another 2 months go by and she finally calls and I tell her we're booked. She gets pissed and tells me that I left her without a videographer a month before her wedding. I referred her to an available videographer and she ended up booking him at the same price she would have had to pay me. I was really available by the way but I knew I was never going to see a payment because she thought she knew me and probably figured I'd do it for nothing.
: Brian M

X-Alan
Imported Account

May 3, 2003, 10:01 AM

Post #6 of 8 (1164 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

I was asked recently to do just that at a deep discount. And this was a close friend, so I was a guest also. I suggested, with my help, to look to hire another professional because I said I would rather enjoy the wedding drinking and participating rather than worry about getting the shot or audio. Who wants to work when you personally know practically everyone at this wedding, is having fun, and you can't drink and socialize with them?
I'm not saying that you can't have fun while you are working, but you can't play 2 roles at once-as i have once read, I think in Hal's book.
Alan

: I am just curious how you guys handle it when friends come to you wanting you to tape their wedding? I have been doing weddings for some time now, and this has been a recurring issue. It seems that everyone in the world becomes your best friend and wants a deal. Please help soon.... lol.

X-Cudex
Imported Account

May 3, 2003, 11:28 AM

Post #7 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

When my wife and I travelled interstate for her friend's wedding I thought about
doing a heavily discounted job, but it wasn't really worthwhile carting my gear
on the aircraft. No car transport and directions would be a problem for
locations etc. The compromise in the end was I used their 1CCD camera and
gear for ceremony and speeches as a favour. As I'm new to the industry (3
professional weddings) I viewed it as experience.
Using my gear I whilst i don't think I should do it for free for all the work
involved, I would probably not go overboard with the editing and call it the
wedding gift - but for close friends only.

X-Clark
Imported Account

May 5, 2003, 10:37 PM

Post #8 of 8 (1163 views)
Shortcut

Re: Weddings for Friends [In reply to]	Can't Post

I have had several problems with this. I would always feel bad when i had to say no to freinds until i was buying a new scanner at best buy. A guy asked me if i had any advise on a good scanner. I told him the research i have done and we got to talking. Some how this topic came up. He had the same problem with being a carpenter. What he said has solved this problem. When you ask a friend for help with something they do for a living and you don't compensate them for it, it's stealing. It might come across as rude at first, but after they think about it they usually understand.